Oh My! What language!

Paul Mather paul at CSGRAD.CS.VT.EDU
Thu Nov 30 13:02:57 EST 1995


Dr. Robert Kohl chokes on his own medicine:

>Regarding item #4 of my previous post: If you don't get the joke, too bad. If
>you're not smart enough to realize when something is said tongue-in-cheek,
>and when its not, maybe you ought to ask before you go ape shit on the list.

It seems my demonstration worked, in a sense.  In another, it failed.  If
you don't get the joke, too bad.  If you're not smart enough to realise
when... oh, what the heck.  Just read what you wrote above.

>If you read it again, the humor is in the format I use "Now class.....or go
>to hell." Obviously, you never knew anyone who attended a Christian school,
>or you would have recognized the parody of a strict school marm.  But if I
>have to explain the joke, well......

How does that BOC song go again?  "...and the joke's on you."

I blame myself.  I KNEW I should have put those smileys on the end of that
"fuck off and die" line, just so everyone would catch on.  (Big clue:
"...the immutable truth of the ages..."---can you get less "IMHO" than that??)

If the overly extreme posting style I affected (inspired by your own "eschew
all these politically correct IMHO and smiley niceties" sentiments, and
taken to the nth degree) caused you upset, then I find that ironic.  That
you---Dr. Bob of all people---would misconstrue it, and react so
dramatically, is surprising given your self-confessed sophistication in
these matters.  Surely that's only something a STUPID IDIOT such as myself
would do.

And, hey, you KNOW that when I write, "your mother is a whore, Dr. Bob," or
"Eric Bloom is a cocaine addict," that I'm just joking around, don't you??
I mean, you can obviously see those implicit "IMHOs" and "smileys" infesting
those statements that come from MY keyboard, right?  Okay, so it may look a
little abrasive, but we're not slack-jawed liberals here, are we?  Everyone
knows all that "IMHO" and stuff is just redundant baggage that serves no
purpose.  None at all.

>                     Unlike you, I have the balls to state my opinion frankly
>(no matter how unpopular),

You didn't think my exposition was frank enough???  I'm surprised.  I
thought I couldn't be more blunt.

>                          and I have the talent to put it in a humorous way
>to take the edge off of it.

Yes, you have a talent, Dr. Bob, there's no denying that.  I guess it's just
me, but I find usually your "humour" just comes off sounding like
patronising condescension.  I guess I must just be an incurable curmudgeon,
or else the IGNORANT DULLARD you take me for.

>                            I don't have to resort to the childish bullshit
>that you do.

"Childish bullshit..."  Wait a minute!  That's the form of humour known as
"irony" you're employing there, isn't it?  Ha ha ha.  I just wet myself.

>             Also, I tend to post original ideas.

I must have missed them, I guess.  It's interesting you know so much about
my BOC-L oeuvre (which spans many years), you being such a relative newcomer.

>Hmmm.....interesting.  Well, Paul, its not so much that I'm bored as that I,
>unlike yourself, actually like to learn about new stuff.

You know so much about me, Dr. Bob, it's frightening!  Do you have private
detectives tailing me?  How else would my dark secret---that I have an
intense hatred of learning---come to light?  And here I was thinking that
hiding out at this university would be the perfect disguise...

>                                                          Case in point:
>there was a thread going about the different brands of guitar, styles, etc.
>Now, its not exactly BOC-related per se (except the comments about the band
>members' choices of guitars).  Since I don't know jack about guitars,
>however, I found this thread very interesting.  Some of it I didn't
>understand, but its called LEARNING.  Hence, my thoughts about off-topic
>stuff on the list.  So instead of railing against it, why don't you take the
>opportunity to learn something so you'll be cured of your ignorance.

Now I KNOW I'm stupid.  I've been going about this LEARNING lark entirely
the wrong way.  When I want to learn I use appropriate and relevant sources.
I don't ask a geologist when I want to find out about multiprocessor cache
coherency.  I don't read "Tattoo Monthly" when I want to learn about
Kolmogorov complexity.  Maybe I should.  It would obviously be a more
efficient technique.
Hey, why don't we just have one Internet e-mail list, where everyone talks
about anything they want.  Just think of how much more LEARNING we'd get done!

As for your case in point, I shall attempt to shed my blanket of ignorance
and, in future, shall address my guitar tech questions to BOC-L instead of
rec.music.makers.guitar.  It's obvious I'll find more guitarists (and
answers) on BOC-L than I will there.

>And if you want to continue discussion on these issues with me, at least have
>the stones to take it off the list.

Do as I say, not as I do, right?

But, as you are at great pains to point out, I am an ignoramus, and know no
better.  In fact, I think I'll go hunt out my Ph.D. certificate right now
and burn it!

>                                   I'll be more than happy to have a
>rational discussion with you.

Don't flatter yourself, Dr. Bob.  I don't have the time to waste.  This will
be my last posting with you on this thread, public or private.  Respond all
you like.  I could care less.  Let's get back to the important discussion of
coffee and motor racing.

Btw, for someone who expresses such disdain for ad hominem attacks, you sure
like using them yourself.

Cheers,

Paul "too spineless ever to put his e-mail address at the end of posts" Mather.

obTape: Hawkwind, _Glastonbury '81_

e-mail: paul at csgrad.cs.vt.edu                     A stranger in a strange land.



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